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Singapore parents

Today's news article for the day is 'Mothers are born, not maid' by Neil Humphreys. His is the latest reaction to a letter in TODAY from a young(?) mum who complained about how some restaurants didn't have baby chairs or booster seats and she and her husband had to take turns carrying the kid (or kids, I can't remember) since they had no maid. This cause them enough inconvenience while dining out for her to write to the press to complain.

I remember a couple of other letters in response to this. This guy wrote that Singaporeans were too spoilt and were always expecting too much. Then this lady wrote to say that she also faced the same problems but get real, her message was, just don't go to these outlets if you find them a problem. Humphreys noted the part about them having no maid to carry the kid and therefore, not being able to enjoy their meals out, and wrote about how his sister takes care of her 3 young children on her own.

First, I must confess that I didn't think too much about the letter when I first read it. I could identify with the experience but I'm not one of those who will go all out to lobby for family-friendly facilities etc. I'm more like that other lady who wrote in. If it is difficult having meals here or there, just don't go to those places. Simple. And realistic. I mean, this is the kind of society we live in, so there are some things we just have to live with. Anyway, we have done this juggling of kid and fork and spoon or chopsticks, and taking turns to eat, etc, and really, it's no big deal, lah. If we could do it at crowded hawker centres, so can anyone.

Having said that, I must also agree that the level of family-friendliness in S'pore could be improved. I wouldn't go so far as to say that all eating places must have child seats, or that MRT trains must have cabins for breastfeeding mums (another letter to the press which launced a whole slew of reactions) but more nursing facilities in public places, easier access for parents with strollers, etc, would be helpful. In KLCC, the female toilet has a little boy's cubicle and kids' wash basin. I can't think of a female toilet in S'pore like that. So impressive, huh?

If there's anything to fight for, I would think that the needs of the disabled, wheelchair-bound and elderly (also hotly debated in TODAY recently) are more critical issues. I was therefore shocked at some of the letters on the topic, including one which said that the disabled were too demanding! Come on, how can the disabled be 'too demanding'?? They have needs which HAVE to be met. I just can't believe how some people dare to have their names printed in the press with letters expressing such sentiments.

As for Neil Humphreys' sister, I am completely in awe of such women. I am reminded also of friends who have/had to take care of kids ALL ON THEIR OWN while living overseas. One of my good friends had 2 of her 3 children while overseas. Another friend of ours takes care of her 2 young ones on her own in Germany, and, what's more, her husband occasionally travels for work. And yet another friend and her husband juggle work and taking care of their young daughter in the UK. And mind you, they also have to take care of their houses which, as we all would know, are much bigger in those countries, they don't have the option of 'tah pau-ing' dinner even if they wanted to, etc. And let's not forget our many Malaysian (and other 'foreign') friends living here who have no one to fall back on for help in childcare.

How do they do it, man?

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